An Intrinsic Exquisite


in which it is


her disappointment was palpable like a bad smell permeating the perimeter of my field of vision

a version of hate crossed her face and distaste made itself felt

unfortunately I adopt whatever emotion is left lingering orphaned

flying, it's distance to the end zone unknown and unpredictable




"I will not be held hostage."

uncertainty is her idea of hell and the state of life on earth
in this she agrees with cynical Christians who insist that we are doomed, juste, a cause d'our manifestation into corporeality

but she doesn't believe that the nature of the body is sin
the nature of life is uncertainty
it is this uncertainty that makes us powerless not our sin

and powerlessness makes us greedy for power
and this greed for power is what causes pain in sentient beings - only because it is unrealizable
because it is not achievable, it creates dis-ease, self-disdain, all bad things
she blames uncertainty

"It's a different kind of shit. But it's all shit every where I look."

"The values decree that we ignore our responsibilities on that level."

"Faggots can improve the world."

"They can make it look better."

"And women can make it feel better."

"But faggots and women spend too much time sucking up to the Marlboro Man, putting their feelings and aesthetics aside, waiting for cold heart to become a care bear."

"Cold heart has to be left by the wayside. He's held things up for too long."

the wind whistled gracefully through the sun infested trees
crunchy, she thought
the wind is crunchy today
or else I'm hungry, and everything sounds like food