Getting help in Austin, Texas

FAMILY VIOLENCE

I am a friend: What can I do?

Strategies for helping persons in abusive relationships: (from SafePlace in Austin):

1. When you see telltale signs of abuse, speak up. Express caring concern "If you ever need to talk, I'm available."

2. Let them know you understand that it's a tough thing to talk about and that you are not embarrassed by the topic.

3. Let them see and hear that you will not judge them, "I'm sure you think that you have been doing what you think is best, but I have to let you know I'm concerned by what I'm seeing..." or "I know how confusing it can be when a loved one treats you this way..."

4. Do not try immediately to rescue them or to convince them to take action (unless they are in imminent danger). Instead, support them to begin to take back control of their life.

5. Gently ask questions about how things are going at home and listen attentively to the reply.

6. Express clear disapproval of their partner's abusive behavior, but to not cut the partner down as a person. "{Your partner} is probably basically a good person, but how s/he is treating you is wrong. In this area s/he needs help."

7. Use specific words to describe behaviors instead of "abuse," such as control, scare, intimidate, bully etc.

8. Make (and repeat) clear statements about their rights and value as a person. "You don't deserve to be treated that way. No one has the right to treat you like that."

9. If they have children, ask how they think the children are being affected. Emphasize that children always suffer when living with abuse, even if it's not directed at them.

10. Tell them you are concerned for their safety (and the future of their relationship) if things continue as they are. Ask, "What do you think your life will be like in six months if things continue as they are?"

11. Write down and give them phone numbers of local resources such as a battered women's shelter and a help line. Encourage them to talk with someone they trust about this before it gets any worse.

12. Do not give up on them. Do not be put off if you are rebuffed at first. Continue to reach out. Remember, they are scared.

13. Get support for yourself and your good efforts from friends and/or staff of a battered women's shelter.

 

What can I do?  
  I am a friend
My family is experiencing violence
I would like to

 

Legal Services Links:
Travis County Attorney's Office
Travis County District Attorney's Office
Legal Aid of Central Texas
Women's Advocacy Project

Social Services Links:
APD Victim Services
TCSO Victim Services
SafePlace: Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Survival Center
Austin Child Guidance Center

Additional Resources:

Domestic Violence Hotlines and Resources

National Domestic Violence Hotline

Violence Against Women Office

Violence Agaianst Men and Women

Family Violence Awareness Page

Husband Battering

Child Abuse:

National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information

Prevent Child Abuse America

National Data Archive on Child Abuse and Neglect

Child Abuse Yellow Pages

Family Violence

Child Abuse

Traffic Accidents and Fatalities

Legal Support and Information